martedì 28 dicembre 2010

0

Le principesse Zelda e Peach sono due zoccole. Anzi, una

Clamoroso al Cibali (provincia di Hyrule) […]
Il video del rapper Patrick Donahue non ci dice alla fine niente di nuovo. Cioè, tranne che Patrick Donahue è un sosia di Laudadio quello di striscia la notizia. Ah, per chi non se ne fosse accorto, quella che fa Peach e Zelda e le facce volgari mentre lecca i Toad è sempre la stessa fanciulla. Il brano però, a prescindere dal Mega Man MC ridicolo, spacca. E il testo pure:
I'm gonna need an extra life
If I'm ever gonna win these games you play with me.
It always ends up me alone
With this side-scrolling road as far as I can see.
Like a Boo, I move on -then- you chase me,
But when I come back, you won't face me.
And when I start to think it's worth the hassle
I come to find out you're in another guy's castle?

And did I mention that you're such a tease,
Always telepathing me that you think that I'm the best.
But anytime I get close you push me away
Well excuuuuse me, Princess.
You know you hold the final piece of my heart,
now you're telling me I gotta start a second quest?
Heh, let me get this off my chest:

You're an 8-Bit Ho.

I hit my head up against the bricks
You got me so confused I think I'm trippin' on shrooms, but
I could never make myself believe that you'd rather spend your time with some low-life goombas...
And when you get hurt, you come back to me,
cause you hate it when you feel alone.
Well I'm sick of being a shoulder to cry on when you let the Hammer Brothers stick their hammers in your warp zone.

I'm the one who comes to save you daily,
yet you're taking your clothes off for Justin Bailey?
These other guys just do it for the nookie.
I save the world and get a batch of Yoshi's cookies?
I don't even think a fire flower could melt that block of ice you call a heart.
And I've taken time to pause.
I think we're better off apart.

I've swam leagues for you,
I've ran miles for you,
Fought those things that shoot lasers out their eyes for you.
Gone thru hell and back just to make you smile.
What's it take to get my cartridge blown once in a while?
You tell me I'm the one, my love for you is big
but you'd rather spend your time with a heartless pig?
I try and move on and you won't let me go,
cause you ain't nothin' but an 8-Bit Ho.

Go save yourself now
that's my final note.
I'm done being used.
Triforcin' that down your throat.
I've finally leveled up and I can finally see
that it's high time to find an upgrade for me.
So I wish you luck and I hope you find love,
but in the end it's just you and a Power Glove.

Heh, you know what's NOT a secret to everybody?

You're an 8-Bit Ho.

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